Heading back to New York, disoriented and empty. With every urge to call Jen my heart breaks. At the showing I kept waiting for Jen to open her eyes and call my name. When I realized that she wasn’t going to get up I wanted to crawl into the casket just like I used to do in her hospital bed.
Each time I fall a little lower I think to myself, “maybe this is the bottom and it’s only up from here.” So far I’m still falling.